SOMETHING I'VE LEARNED

This weight loss journey started a long time ago for me. It wasn't when I saw myself in summer pictures and thought "No way...that's me?". It wasn't when I had to buy a size 18 wedding dress. Nope...I realized last night as I was doing my Bible study that this journey started when I was 13.

When I was 13, our family moved from ethnically diverse central FL to white bread Woodstock, GA. It was a culture shock to say the least. PLUS I was 13 and that is NOT a good time to move a child. Period. I went from having a lot of friends to nada. Let me just say that now I look back and I see God's hand in that, but to a highly dramatic and hormonal middle schooler, I didn't see God in it. Of course, I wasn't looking for Him. I could have but I didn't. Anyway, because I was 13 and didn't know how to fit in with the people around me, I turned to laying on my butt and eating. I gained weight in that first year in Woodstock and really have struggled with it since.

Reading that part of my Bible study helped me realize that it doesn't have to be something horrific in your life to drive you to eating your troubles away. It can be the small things too. Things like...your hair is curling the wrong way, my boss yelled at me for something I didn't do right or my kids are driving me LOONY. Anything you use to justify eating that treat is (listen me now) Satan's way of tricking you into dependence on food for comfort. Satan says, "You need this. This (insert treat here) will give you so much pleasure and release from your life." And like a meth addict, I keep coming back. I never, never, ever realized my need for "comfort" food until I started reading this book. I didn't consider myself a emotional eater but now I realize that I am. I may not eat a whole bag of chips after a bad day, but I can certainly drink a whole gallon of sweet tea or eat macaroni and cheese until it's coming out of my eyeballs. Satan was using the small let-downs and the bad days to get me to eat bad stuff.

Here's the quote from 'Made to Crave' by Lysa Terkeurst that opened my eyes:
"Satan wants us to sneak things in secret. Things hidden
and done in secret clues the father of darkness into our weaknesses and opens
the door for him to assault us with targeted schemes."

When I realized who I was really fighting, my eyes were open to the truth. God wants us to eat and enjoy food. God wants us to relax. God only wants the best for us. The devil will always want to trap you and enslave you to dependence on anything other than God. After all, if you aren't depending on God, then who are you depending on? Yourself? I know that I will let myself down time and time again if I have to depend on myself to get me through this journey. I am learning to depend on God in this journey and the other journeys I'm sure He will lead me to. Believing in God and living Biblically doesn't mean your life will never have trials. You will. When you choose to believe in Jesus, to really turn your life from one direction and into His direction, your eyes will be open to so much truth. It is a lifelong journey. It is one I continue to learn to do DAILY.

Turn your life around today and seek Him!

ACCOUNTABILITY

In the Bible study I've been doing, the writer expressed the need for an accountability partner. This person not only needs to be there for your weight loss efforts but for your spiritual needs too. I was burdened that I really needed someone because the only time I get to sit with my peers and discuss the Bible is in Sunday School. I needed someone outside of that to lean on, get feedback from and to vent to. I prayed about it and He put a person on my heart. I reached out and asked this person and it turns out that she needed one too! Why am I surprised when God does these things?

Having an accountability partner is one of the best things you can do for any weight loss program you are on (or just for maintaining what you've lost). It's also a sign of vulnerability. You have to be brutally honest with this person and with yourself. You can't hide your secrets (like that pesky Easter chocolate I keep sneaking). In turn, for you to be someone A.P. you have to be honest with them. You have to tell them "well, I think you shouldn't eat the fries with lunch" when you know they won't like hearing that.

My A.P. told me that I should work out more than 3 times a week. I did NOT want to hear this. I was thinking I was doing OK but she really showed me that I DO need to work out more. At first I got kind of depressed about this, but then I realized by her being honest with me, it will give her and I an opportunity to find an answer to me working out more. Since I have this lovely foot problem, running or walking fast is out of the question. I don't own equipment at home (I don't have the room to) and when I do DVD's, I get bored. Anyway, with her help we'll figure this out. It's an awesome feeling knowing that someone is HELPING me through this.

If you are trying to do this journey of weight loss/better health/exercise alone, I encourage you to:

1. Ask God to guide you through your journey. Turn to Him and NOT food!


2. Ask God to lay someone on your heart to be an A.P. for you. He knows who that person should be before you do.

This blog is a kind of accountability for me so here's my honesty. I've gained 5 lbs and I can't get it off (not to mention the other 50 lbs I need to lose). It frustrating to have lost down to 190 then I'm back up to 195 in a blink. Every pound lost for me is a struggle and it is hard fought. I applaud all of you out there that can lose 25 in 2-3 months. I wish my body would but God has given me this struggle and I delight in it. For "when I am weak, He is strong".